According to research, the best marriages are those that have a solid foundation on friendship. Building a strong friendship with a potential lifetime partner is even more valuable to foreign men seeking a Chinese life mate through Chinese dating. Indeed, cross-cultural relationships can weather storms more successfully if the foreign man and the Chinese woman are not just lovers and partners, but also each other’s best friend.
Online dating actually serves as a very valuable medium in which cross-cultural friendships can be cultivated; these friendships, in turn, can serve as a solid platform upon which amorous relationships can be built. While in a lot of ways, online dating can be limiting to the formation and nourishment of a relationship, these same limitations can also be used to establish a more stable and enduring connection between two people.
Some happy married couples were friends first before they were lovers; others forged the friendship after the initial attraction or even after love has blossomed. For the latter, working on also becoming friends and not just lovers/partners sometimes has to be a conscious effort willingly given by both.
Of course, it is important that both the man and the woman are already on the same page about the serious long-term potential of their online relationship. Honesty with each other’s intentions and expectations are paramount. After all, it is the basis of all types of successful relationships.
First of all, two people can establish early on in the relationship, even before the two decide to take the next big step and meet in person, whether they have similar interests, values, priorities, and world views. If they do, then going forward will be easier; if they don’t, they can still choose to “spend some more time together” online to determine if there are other things that make them compatible which are not obvious on the outset.
Secondly and given that they have already discovered their compatibilities, they can dig deeper and learn more about each other’s motivations, and in the process, also learn about each other’s lifelong dreams, long-term goals, and even their disappointments.
Opening up like this to another person can be scary, and it certainly does not come easy to many. But if a strong connection or attraction is already present, if they are compatible with each other in a lot of ways, and if both are serious about finding love and a life partner and believe that what they have has serious potential, then opening up oneself to the other is an inevitability, anyway.
Baring one’s deeper thoughts and emotions also requires immense trust and, in effect, demonstrates one’s willingness to trust the other person. It will naturally be expected of the other person to value the trust placed upon them and reciprocate. In this way, the connection that already exists will be made even stronger and, despite the distance, they will feel closer to each other.
It is also essential that both show a willingness to learn about the other’s culture, as well as show appreciation of and respect for it. After all, the entirety of a person is influenced by his/her culture and his/her culture is a part of him/her; and being in a cross-cultural relationship means having the willingness to accept the other person for everything he/she is.
How can one know if their partner/lover is also their friend? When they are confident that no matter what happens to the romantic relationship, they can always count on the other to be there when it really counts.
It is a given that one cannot really know another person only through online communications, be it through email, chat, or video chat. Meeting in person and spending adequate time together in a real-world setting is still important.
At the same time, two people can make the weeks or months they spend together online, prior to meeting in person, more meaningful by also working to become friends. Once they have met and they have ascertained that what they have is the real thing, then all the other pieces will not only fit together seamlessly, but will also be glued together by the friendship that they had formed.
Discover tons of great information about Chinese dating and Chinese women on the blogs, magazine and forum of ChinaLoveMatch.net (the home of trusted Chinese dating), where international men and Chinese women share their life experiences and bare their souls to give you the real goods on love, cross-cultural relationships, and all things Chinese.
ChinaLoveMatch.net 